Behind the Mask - The Impostor Syndrome.

In this blog I talk about Impostor Syndrome, exploring some of the roots of it, the difficulties it can cause and how I help people to overcome it.

Amongst many things, 2020 has been the year of the mask.

The face mask – the nation’s must-have, must-wear item for many areas of our lives. We’ll ‘happily’ pop on a mask for a trip to the shops or as we hop on a bus. When people have their masks on, their expressions and emotions can be difficult to gauge – we may even have to look twice to spot people we know well in this new daily disguise.

Whilst it’s been a big step for us all to put on such visible masks in public, the reality is that we’ve probably experienced times when we are wearing invisible masks. Those times where people do see our face, our actions and reactions, but where under the surface we may be thinking or feeling something quite different. Behind this invisible mask we can be controlling or hiding things that remain unseen and unspoken, and we can almost feel as though we are pretending to be someone else.

In the late 1970s, Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes wrote an academic paper, the content of which helped to articulate this. Based on personal experience of feelings of failure in exam time despite evident abilities, and witnessing the same feelings from their counselled students, they coined the term, the ‘Impostor Phenomenon’. This has gone on to be well-researched and documented, with the revelation that this is a common trait – now often referred to as ‘impostor syndrome’.

An example of how widespread this is, comes from a 2019 study of 1,000 adults in the UK who had all been in their jobs for at least 3 years. This found that despite their evident ability to sustain their job, 80% of men and 90% of women felt incompetent at work, with 48% experiencing intrusive thoughts. Are you one of these people?

Do you feel that the people around you are more intelligent than you? Do you worry about your ability to perform even when those around you believe in your capabilities? Do you fail to take the credit for your achievements, thinking you ‘got lucky’?

Welcome to the world of the impostor.

Some people may just have a brief experience of this. Others score higher on the scale (yes there is a scale) and live with these feelings daily. But this comes at a cost. Invisible masks don’t come cheap.

If you are thinking that you are out of your depth and ‘it’s only a matter of time until I’m found out’ then there are a multitude of things going on for you. It means living in a state of fear or anxiety, lacking in self-belief and being unkind to yourself, and regarding any success as being undeserved. It sounds exhausting because it is exhausting, and it’s got the potential to affect not just you but those around you.

So how does someone who feels as though they are an impostor stop this damaging cycle of thought? How do you deal with this chronic self-doubt?

The 1000 adults in the survey believed that solutions lay in more feedback, an open environment, mentoring, coaching or access to mental health services.

My experience is that people in many walks of life experience impostor syndrome – I’ve seen students, CEOs and professional athletes amongst others. Often their background might include a tendency for perfectionism, difficulty in handling criticism and low self-esteem. Whatever the roots, these are people who on the face of it seem to be achieving a lot in life, but in reality are masking unhappiness. For some, this pretence has escalated badly, leaving them with painful personal situations. The good news is that there are ways of addressing it. I know that the toolbox of skills and techniques I can provide can help people boost their self-esteem and take back control of their situation. Crucially, the safe space I offer, means that people can feel free to be honest, to be themselves and to stop pretending.

It’s finally an opportunity to remove the mask.